I LOVE to camp (kind of)

As a day or two has passed I am becoming scared at the thought I was so excited to be outside. I did really love it but now that I am back in the comfort of home once again I think-- was I nuts? The dirt, spiders, bugs, extreme temp, lack of shelter, scary toilet hole, no sink, no flush toilet, no shower, I think I must have been crazy to think I was so happy there. Or maybe I am losing my mind. Because I did love to make smores with Maddy who got them just right as they were extremely messy. I loved how she and Taylor waited for turns on my lap. How it was so quite before everyone else arrived and Scott and I just reveled in our alone quite time. Mason jumped in to the fire pit before the fire was roaring and got filthy and Sarah jumped into save him and then sat in the dirt and seemed just happy being totally dirty. Part of me thought good for her- dirt it up and the other part was thinking get this girl a hose and some soap. My parents forbid me to get dirty or even sweat as a child. Really it was more my mom who had the hang up about sweat and dirty. My dad just liked things clean and perfect. Our neighbors use to tease my mom incessantly about us sweating or getting dirty. I am not saying I had a bad childhood and that it ruined my love for dirt. I embarrassed my parents love for clean. One of the main reason I do not like to camp is hygiene or lack there of because usually it leads to illness and a trip to the hospital which I really do not like. OK why am I back pedaling? It could be that from Sat. morning I have been running a high fever with no reason to have a high fever. My best guess is maybe it is from the pesticides I lathered on or the heat from the fire or the freezing cold. I did not get bitten by anything. Maybe it is like I believed when I was young and I am allergic to the outside?? NO I think I had a good time. OH- at least I have some cute photos. You the weird part about my mom is that she grew up at a cabin every summer in Island Park. They must have had dirt and bugs up there back then right? Maybe she was just nervous because of my JRA and other health issues and the doctors scaring her? I need to ask her about all this. The kids all loved it. Backy had all these fun things to do like make bird feeders and giant bubbles. I think I really liked it. No I am sure I did I am just a littel freaked out by the fever.